Day 136

I'd say that my life is back to 'normal' but it's not. I see the doctor again this week. I can't believe that it's been over a month of walking on my own two feet. I have gained another cm in my calf. I have 3 cm left to go until my calves look the same.
My typical day is work and the gym. I have physical therapy twice a week still. My days at physical therapy have gotten much harder.
The storm that just came in has given me a reality check that my ankle is not going to like cold weather. I've been doing ok with flexibility however this week if I sit on the couch for any period of time my ankle tightens up. It hurts to walk after that. And reminds me to go to the gym and do my physical therapy exercises. O so fun...

Day 108

Another milestone... I got my car back today. I missed my car, my radio and my power windows.

Day 103

Another milestone... today I know can wear two shoes. No more walking boot!

Day 98

Time starts to fly when you start healing. I can't believe that it's coming up to 3 months since surgery. So much in my life has changed in these past months, in most things it seems that it is a positive in my life.
I'm starting to get back into a normal routine. The gym is great, most of the time. I feel so gimpy while I'm working out. I just remind myself that I am improving and that my foot is doing better.
The snow has started to fall on the mountain. It's bittersweet. This season is suppose to be better than last year. Hopefully, I'll be able to enjoy the end of it. I'm keeping my fingers crossed to be able to make it to Whistler in February. It will be 6 months after surgery. I'm doing my part to make sure my body will be ready for it. Then it will be up to the doctor and physical therapist to give me the OK.
The rainy season has started. Hopefully next week when I see the doctor, I'll be able to remove my walking boot for good and be back into a shoe.

Day 86

This morning I woke up quite sore. I'm trying to think which exercises at physical therapy yesterday have caused so much pain.
I am more then ready to be able to walk 'normally' again. I think about going to the gym and running or using the stair machine. Then I remember that I can't do those things. I hope soon that I will be able to get into the pool and start working out. I need to clear it through the doctor and physical therapist.
This week has been painful at therapy but it has been rewarding. I am starting to get definition back in my calf. I don't have a wussy calf anymore. It doesn't look like normal. But it's probably close to half normal.
It's starting to get cold now. The boot keeps my foot warm. I've tried to put on a sock but it makes my foot too warm. So, I'm looking forward to being able to wear two shoes again.

Day 84

It's been over 2 months since my surgery. I feel like I have made huge improvements since the surgery. But at the same time, I feel so limited in my abilities. The muscle mass in my calf is improving. The muscle just doesn't hang anymore and I am starting to get definition already. I can't wait to be able to walk 'normal' again. Physical therapy is going well. It's a lot of work but it rewarding.
Jim and I are going to a corn maze this weekend. The weather is going to be nice. It should be a good time.

Day 80

I'm doing my best to do all of my physical therapy each day. I have to split everything up and do different things each day. When I was doing the same thing every day, I hurt. I need to get to the gym more so that I can ride the bike and use the same equipment that I use at PT. The gym has the many different balance balls, half balls and all the ones in between. I do have the rubber bands at home. However, it is easier to stay focused at the gym.
Let's see if I can make it to the gym tomorrow.

Side note: I made awesome pumpkin butterscotch cookies today. Yum!

Day 74

Today, I got to play on the Wii Fit for physical therapy. One would imagine that it would be fun. It kinda was. However, it is hard when your body is not use to having even weight on each foot.

Day 72

Today was my first day back at the gym since my injury. They have added more equipment which is great. It was crappy to feel so weak riding the bike in front of other people. I am doing so much better but I still feel very weak.

Day 71

Massage therapy is such a wonderful thing.

Day 68

Today at physical therapy, I had to walk forwards and backwards. One would think that it is not hard except when you have to think about how to move your foot when you do these tasks. I did little mini squats. Mini because my flexibility in my ankle is still minimal. All of the pain is paying off. I am getting better even if it is tiny bits at a time.

Day 61

In the past week, my flexibility has increased in my foot. I have more exercises from the physical therapist. Since I have been walking in my boot, it is pushing my hip up and throwing everything out of whack. With this injury, it seems like I'll be rehabbing most of my body. At the moment, I'm learning how to move my foot again and all the little things that you take for granted.

Day 60

Oh the joys of doing too much... I walked on my foot WAY too much this weekend. I paid for it last night and all day today. The walking boot puts my foot, knee and hip in an awkward position. My whole body aches. I guess I'll be glad to have it off on Wednesday when if that means I'm back on my crutches. I'll trade it gladly for less pain.
I've been good about doing my exercises. It is causing less nausea when I go through the exercises. I know that is a good thing. But the color in my foot is not what it should be. The skin on my foot is still hyper sensitive. This causes my foot to look like it is still swollen.
Hopefully, I'll hear good things from my PT tomorrow.

Day 55

Today was the first day that I did my physical therapy exercises at home. It wasn't too bad. It was just as exhausting as yesterday. Then I soaked my foot in alternately hot and cold water. This is suppose to help desensitize my skin. It didn't feel too bad but it was shocking each time.

Day 54

Today was my first day of physical therapy. It was exhausting. My leg has lost 6 cm in girth. My calf is so tiny that it hangs straight down from my bone when I lift it up. I have a lot of work to do to get my muscles working properly again.
I'm just taking one day at a time...

Day 51

It's been 5 weeks since surgery. Since I got my boot off on Wednesday, I haven't had the energy to take a shower. I did that this morning. I think it took 15 minutes to shave my lower leg. It was so hairy. Plus, it's just difficult. My quad and calf are very weak. It's crazy to see the size difference. It's even worse to not be able to move my foot much. I can barely lift my foot up. It takes all my concentration to lift my foot up or to move it side to side. I try to do that a couple times a day since that's what I'll be doing at physical therapy. I'm happy that I don't have to sleep with my boot on. I feels great to be able to have air on my leg again.
I just hope that my physical therapy goes well. I want to be able to start walking on my own soon.

Day 50

I am so exhausted. I got my massage again tonight. I feel good. I can't wait to sleep in tomorrow and get some much needed rest this weekend.

Day 49

Yesterday, I saw my doctor again. I got my cast off. My leg is very hairy. I start physical therapy next week but very limited. My doctor is concerned that I having pain in my calf. I'm still on crutches. My pain is limiting my walking. I'm hoping that this weekend will allow my foot to feel better. I can't wait for tomorrow evening. It's massage time again. I'm thinking that a massage is a wonderful way to start a weekend. :)

Day 47

My body is starting to just fall apart. My arms hurt. My hips hurt. I just want to sleep again. Tomorrow, I get my cast off and I'm back in a walking boot for 2 weeks. Physical therapy starts next week. I'm sure I have no idea what I'm in for. This whole experience is keeping me on my toes. Nothing has been as expected.

Day 44

I got to have some female bonding time today. Stephanie cut my hair. I look 'cute' again. My hair had gotten so long. I promised pictures of my stitches from last week. So here they are...

I was not expecting my scar to be this long. Everyone that I had saw before mine was 3 inches. Well at least I got a large scar for the amount of money that I paid.

Day 43

I survived my first week back to work. I am so exhausted that I have been shaking since yesterday. I can't wait to catch up on sleep this weekend. I just got home from a massage. It was wonderful. The therapist was great. I hope that this will help my muscles relax so that I can sleep better. So here's to the weekend and much needed rest and relaxation for my body.

Day 42

The foot is feeling a little better today. I was disappointed that I didn't get a new cast. I was going to rock a pink cast for a week. I'm exhausted and ready for the weekend.

Day 41

Sorry that I've been MIA. I started back to work this week. I'm exhausted. I fall asleep about 8 pm these days. It doesn't leave much time for anything. I don't get home until 6 pm. My foot hurts from driving home and a day of work is draining. I don't do a thing except put my foot up to reduce the swelling and eat some dinner. I don't have much energy.
I can't walk on my foot yet. The swelling for the past 3 days has been horrid. I was suppose to get this cast removed today and get a new one to help with the swelling. Well instead, the 'cast guy' just preformed a 'bi-valve'. Basically, cut on both sides of my cast so it's in two pieces and wrapped it in ace bandages. He says that I can walk on it but it doesn't seem like it will support my ankle very well. I guess at the moment it's a mute point since my foot hurts too much to walk on.
The theme for the past 4 days is badly swollen foot and exhaustion.

Day 39

First day back to work.

Day 37

It's been almost 3 weeks since surgery and I still don't feel like 'normal'. I want my energy to return. I need to be able to work a full week come Monday. I still can't walk on my foot. My heel hurts bad. I hope before I get the cast off that I'll be able to walk without my crutches. I need to become more mobile and independent.
The theme at the moment is frustrated and hurting...

Day 34

I got my stitches out today and my new cast. It was very painful. My foot hurts. I can walk on the cast but I tried. It hurts too much. I have 2 weeks in the cast and 2 weeks in a walking boot then physical therapy starts. My cast is so much lighter then the plaster one that I've had on for the past 2 1/2 weeks. It almost feels like nothing. Crazy.
My life fell apart today...

Day 33

I finally get to go home today...

Day 28

It's not so much fun when I foot cramp makes your ankle ache for hours. Any pushing movement of my foot causes way too much pain and irritation.
I look forward to the day, I mean night, that I can sleep well and sleep through the night. It seems like it takes most of the night for my body to relax enough for me to get some sleep.

Day 26

Another day of doing nothing and trying to feel better. My life is really not that exciting for a blog at the moment. Since I can't do anything 'doctors orders', I don't have much to talk about. I'm trying not to think to much about Jim being gone. It will just make me more sad and upset. I need to try to stay happy and positive to heal. It really does suck that I'm missing my vacation instead I'm recovering from surgery...

Day 24

One would think that it is easy to sit/lay around all day and have people take care of you...
I going to have to disagree. It's been a week of recovery and my body is just sore.

Day 23

Jim left for Burning Man today and didn't leave at the same time.
I'm at my parents until after Labor Day. It's hard not being at my house. It's so much easier being in your own space. My poor kitty, Nala, is home all by herself till I return. I hope all the living things that are dependent on me will survive the next 6 weeks when I can start taking care of them again. My saltwater tanks need cleaned. It's a good thing that I mainly have coral tanks and inverts. I just hope my beautiful sea urchin survives. He is the most beautiful short spine that I have ever seen, so many colors. I have given up on my flowers outside and most of my plants inside. With the hot weather, I think everything outside is almost dead. Although, I Jim and I ate some of our cherry tomatoes the other day. They were very good.
I guess I can sum up everything as frustration at the moment. I can't do anything for myself. I can't even be in my home because I boyfriend is gone on vacation, without me. The things that I enjoy to do, I can't. Recovering from surgery has been horrid.

Day 22

I am sick of feeling bad. I quit taking my pain meds yesterday. My body and mind feels better. I don't feel like I'm in fog. My foot is doing well. I'm keeping it elevated and minding doctors orders. I'm exhausted and doing nothing. The recovery has not been fun. I wonder if the bad post op recovery is causing the recovery to be difficult and slow.
Tomorrow, Jim leaves for burning man. It will be a long 11 days till I get to see him again. Yes, I'm sad and hurt and frustrated. Just one day at a time...

Day 20

The pain in my foot is much better today. I was able to keep it elevated better last night. So this morning, my leg and foot felt much better. The muscle spasms are horrible today. Each time my foot spasms, it causes a lot of pain. My body has hurt all day today. The pain killers are doing the job, I guess. I don't have pain in my foot. I just feel bad everywhere else.

Day 19, 1 day post-op

The surgery went well according to what the surgeon told Jim and my parents. The recovery yesterday was horrid. My pain was more than the amount of pain medication that they would give me. My blood pressure dropped very low, almost passed out. I was very sick and queasy. It took me a long time to be fully conscience. It was rough. My nurse was amazing. She took such good care of me. Once I got home, I felt ok and my foot was doing ok. I felt better than I thought I would.
Today is a much different day than yesterday. The word for today is PAIN! Just trying to get up this morning and move to the couch was unbelievable pain. It took over an hour for the pain to be bearable once I got to the couch. I was told that today would be more painful but I didn't except it to be this bad. I don't even want to move.
Sorry, no pictures from surgery. Jim didn't bring his camera.

Day 18

Well... I guess I'm ready for surgery... as much as I can be. Surgery is at 830 this morning. I'm suppose to be home today. Here's to another surgery. Two more than I ever wanted. I remember how bad I felt after the last one, an appendectomy. I felt so weak. I'm sure my hardest thing to deal with will be 1 not doing anything for 2 weeks and 2 letting others in my life take care of me.

Day 17

Well, I worked 11 hours yesterday and didn't finish the things that I needed to do. I'll be back in the office today to finish. I'm exhausted. So far I'm trying not to think about surgery tomorrow, I'm sure by the end of tonight it will be the only thing on my mind.
Good news... my friend had her baby. Hopefully, I can find time to meet the new little girl today.

Day 16

There is nothing like working on a Saturday, especially when I have surgery on Monday. I have multiple projects to finish up as much as I can before I leave for 2 weeks. Today is going to be another hot day in Portland. But I'd rather have my foot up at home, resting. I guess I'll have plenty of that to do in the next 2 weeks.

Day 14

A day closer to surgery. Of course, I'm not dealing with it well. I'm going to be doing nothing but laying down for 2 weeks. I just have to focus on the fact that once I get my cast again, 2 weeks after surgery, that it will only be 4 weeks and I might get to start walking again.
I just need to be able to focus on myself and healing come Monday. My boss is so upset with me at the moment that it might be hard to do. Some may say that it should be easy. However working for a tiny company and having a boss that has abandonment issues is going to make it difficult.

Day 13 part 2

So, the trip to the doctor when almost as planned. Surgery is scheduled for Monday. The shock for the day, recovery is 10-14 days. I will be basically laying down with my foot elevated for 2 weeks. Ick!
I'll have access to the internet and my phone. Please send messages or call if you have time to spare. Life is going to be trying.

My foot did finally bruise. My thoughts on why I haven't had much pain... there was nothing to hurt. The tendon was completely torn. The heat has caused my leg and foot to swell alot.

Day 13

I go to the doctor in a couple hours. I did get my MRI on Monday night. The tech unofficially told me that the rupture is lower in my ankle. So the next step looks like surgery. I'm not really happy about it. But the re-rupture rate is 2-3 % with surgery and 10-12% without. It's not a hard choice to make. The new doctor said that active is active. If I want to continue the activities that I enjoy, that surgery would be a benefit. Emotionally, it's hard to hear this now.

Day 11

Today so far has been way too emotional. Since I fell yesterday, I felt that I needed to see my doctor. Well, I saw someone else today. Sometimes second options are good and sometimes, like now, they make you cry. I was told that I possibly should have had surgery on my tendon. I should have had an MRI to find the location of the rupture. Those are not the words that I wanted to hear today.
So tonight at 8pm, my first MRI. I've had a cat scan. The sunshine in the storm- at least, it's only my foot that will be going into the machine since I am claustrophobic, not that it controls my life. It just freaks me out and can make me panic sometimes.
So, the doctor cannot determine if the fall injured my Achilles more than it was. But it did cause swelling and more problems.

Offer up any advice about what I should do about falling at Red Robin...

Day 10

Today was going so well.
We stopped for dinner at Red Robin on our way home from Jim's parents. The short story, I went to the restroom to wash my hands and coming back fell because there was water on the ground. No signs in the two directions I went, nothing. I seem to be ok. I'll see how I feel in the morning. Honestly, I hope that I'm ok. If I'm not, I'll start figuring that out tomorrow.

Note to self: No more falling, it hurts!

Day 9

I did nothing today. I sat on the couch and watched the Olympics. Jim and I went to my parents so Jim and my dad could work on his Jeep. It ended up being the whole day. One would think that it would be easy to spend the whole day on the couch and watch tv. I think that I spent 8 hours sitting on the couch watching the Olympics. I hurt. I'm starting to get stir crazy because if I'm not at work, I sit on the couch with my foot up. It's getting old.

Jim took me to a nice dinner at a Japanese restaurant. It was a nice way to end the day.

Day 8

The theme for today is exhausted. My body is tired from the crutches. Plus, I don't always sleep well at night because my foot and leg will start hurting. My mind is toast from a crappy week at work; it seemed like I could not do anything correctly. Then emotionally, I'm a wreak.

I'm grateful for every email and phone call. They do make me feel good. Thank you everyone.

Day 7

Well, it's been 1 week...
I went to my scheduled soccer game tonight to say HI to everyone. It was nice to be there. I could almost forget about my cast. I'm pretty bummed to be sidelined again. I'm trying to be positive. But every time I'm reminded about all the things that I'm missing out on, it hurts.
One of the things that hurt the most is missing out on the vacation that Jim and I planned. We were going to burning man; in just a few weeks. It was to be each of our first time there. Now, he's going and I'm not. It really hurts down deep. I'm going to miss out on a huge life experience that it won't be the same when we can go together. Jim keeps trying to convince me that I can go and it will be the same. It won't be the same. Crutches are a very draining situation.

Day 6

It's been hot for Portland. The past few days it has been over 90. It's not fun moving around in crutches in the hot weather. Just trying to get ready for work, I'm covered in sweat. Ick! The heat has caused my foot to swell. It hurts.
Monday, I got my chair for the shower. It has been a chore to stand on one foot and try to shower. Tonight, it was almost relaxing. I still need to get a cast cover since the garbage bag is not water proof.

Day 5

Today was my first day back to work. It was rough getting up and getting ready. I'm driving Jim's Jeep to work. I'm frustrated that I keep my car in good condition. Jim's Jeep is not driving very well at the moment. The belts are slipping. There is an electrical problem. Then there's the ok gas mileage. I'm grateful to have a way to get to work on my own. I have a little bit of independence back.
Emotionally, things are rough/bad. I'm still coping with the fact that I'm really dependent on people in my life. Plus, I can't do much of anything that was a part of my life. I can't even really use my camera. I'm frustrated. I'm happy that I don't have to have surgery. But I'm still thinking about all the things that I'm going to miss out on during the next 6 months.
All the things that I you don't really think about are a huge chore from eating to showering and especially opening a door.

Day 4

My arms are starting to get use to the crutches. I'm still exhausted trying to go anywhere. Hopefully, my arms will buff quickly.
I'm going to attempt to work tomorrow. Here's to taking one day at a time...

Day 2

I did more today then I should have. Jim and I went to the Red Bull Flugtag. It was great until the crowds blocked the view for everyone in the disabled area.
I needed some pampering. I trip to get a manicure and pedicure was much needed. My hands hurt from the crutches and the massage was very appreciated. My toes are all cute now and make my green cast. I'll be getting new casts so I might as well have my toes match each time. I was thinking about getting a pink cast for the fun of it. But I don't think I could handle having my toes pink.

Day 1

I meet with the Orthopedic Surgeon this afternoon. The good news is that I don't have to have surgery. The bad news is that my recovery is about 6 months. For the next 8 weeks, I have a hard cast. For 4 to 6 weeks after that I have a soft cast.

The lowdown... in 3.5 months I get to put weight on my left foot again.

Since I was anticapating surgery, I haven't eaten anything all day. Time for some food!

Day 0

The reason for starting this blog occured Thursday night just before 9pm. I was playing indoor soocer and ruptured my achilles tendon in my left foot. The ER wait was short. I got 3 films of my foot, an ice bag and new crutches.

So, the adventure begins of my recovery...